IT'S been described as the black dog that
never stops following you.
Winston Churchill, Michelangelo, Isaac
Newton and Judy Garland had it.
So has Ballarat resident Bill Dobell.
He's battled depression ever since returning from the Vietnam War 25 years
ago - but that hasn't stopped him from reaching out and helping his fellow servicemen.
Bill, who grew up in Melbourne and regional
Victoria, joined the army when he was 18.
He thought he would give it a go for six years and then become a cop, like his dad.
However, two years into his service, after spending weeks in hot, damp jungles killing Vietcong and dodging landmines, his life
had changed for good.
He went from a kid with happy blue eyes to a messed-up, angry bloke.
"I was a `scout' which means that I was at the front of the pack looking for any movement, colour or shine. I went into enemy camps alone, trod on virgin ground that could have been littered with landmines," he said.
"We could spend up to six weeks in the bush fighting and then one or two days usually reacting to other emergencies. I went to Hong Kong for six days R and R but I can't remember much," he said.
Seven months later Bill was out of the jungles and back in Australia after
contracting a tropical illness.
He spent three weeks recovering in the
Heidelberg Repatriation Hospital before being posted to Canungra in the Sunshine Coast hinterland to train troops for Vietnam.
Despite the gorgeous sub-tropical countryside soothing his spirits, he
knew things weren't quite right.
He hit the bottle to cope with the aftermath of Vietnam - insomnia, fits of
rage and crippling depression.
"During the '80s, it got to the stage where he would come home from work on
Friday afternoon, get into his dressing gown and sit in the loungeroom doing
nothing until it was time to go to back to work," his wife Margaret said.
"I thought of walking out many times during our 33 years of marriage and it was
hard on our kids."
Bill's working life ended in 1996 when his doctor ordered that he could not continue due to his ill-health.
At the height of his earning power he was
reduced to living on a $30,000 annual
compensation package.
But, with medication and careful monitoring by his doctor, he learnt to handle his depression and started helping returned
servicemen apply for their rights and entitlements.
He also spent time counselling those who
couldn't cope with the aftermath of war.
"Many of the 300 veterans living in the region have some kind of mental illness," he said.
He believes their high rate of distress is due to the long stretches of intensive
fighting during the war.
"The average soldier was in combat exposure for 320 days of the year, a lot more than World War II," he said.
After giving up so much for the Australian
Government - "They promised we'd be looked
after when we returned," he said - Bill has spent the past six years fighting for
fair compensation packages for returned servicemen and war widows.
He is angry that the Howard Government has
reduced packages by about $80 a fortnight since 1998 while dole payments have steadily increased.
He also wants war widows under 57.5 years to receive the same entitlements as
older widows.
"Compensation packages are not increasing in line with the rising cost of living," he said. "It's an injustice - 500 young men died, mostly violently, in Vietnam. Since then many have suicided and their children's suicide rate is three times higher than the national average.
"They died believing that, if we survived, we would be looked after, yet the
government has turned its back not only on us, but those in Iraq and Afghanistan also," he said.
Anyone seeking support for depression should call Lifeline on 131144, SANE Mental Health Information Line on 1800688382.