“WHERE do you want to die?”
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That was the most confronting but beneficial question George Lund ever asked his late wife, Moira.
After spending every other week hopping in and out of ambulances, the couple had reached a pivotal moment in their fight against Mrs Lund’s lung disease.
When the comforts of home appeared more appealing than the sterile surrounds of the hospital, the pair was at peace, Mr Lund said.
“It just put that end dot on it ... we were fortunate enough that we were comfortable talking about it,” he said.
At first the idea of managing his sick wife at home filled Mr Lund with dread, however home-based palliative care from Ballarat Hospice Care provided assistance.
“They taught me how to administer drugs and have been a massive support throughout,” said Mr Lund, who added he “couldn’t have carried on” without the hospice’s ongoing presence.
Daughter Jo Labbett, who is a nurse, said her mother’s biggest fear was to die feeling stressed, but instead there was “no anxiety, no struggle”.
Mrs Lund died in June surround by her nine children, nieces and nephews.
“I feel like I was part in helping her die,” said Mr Lund, who often felt isolated from his wife while she was in hospital.
Ms Labbett said the family had no regrets and said it was the most powerful death she had experienced as a nurse.
Ballarat Hospice Care, which is hosting a Celebration of Remembrance on October 9, continues to provide bereavement support to Mr Lund.
“We’re funded for another 12 months, but we don’t have a timeframe on bereavement,” said supportive care team counsellor Liz Dawson.
Ms Dawson said the ceremony was a chance to remember loved ones.
“It’s about recognising that grief can last forever and you don’t forget someone when they die,” she said.
william.vallely@fairfaxmedia.com.au
AT A GLANCE
WHAT: Ballarat Hospice Care Celebration of Remembrance
WHEN: Thursday, October 9, 6pm
WHERE: St Patrick’s College Pavilion, Wanliss Road