Under stormy skies in Rome, in the midst of a sea of travellers, a group of clerical sexual abuse victims travelled to Vatican City in search of "lost boys" whose spirits were almost broken by paedophile priests on the other side of the world.

Their figures seemed tiny in comparison to the walled enclave of Catholic buildings in the city of Rome.

But against all odds, despite years of darkness and pain, they were here. 

For many of the men, no religious trove of art and architecture built as an earthly representation of God would ever be enough to restore their faith in the afterlife.

WATCH THE VIDEO WITH ANDREW COLLINS AND PAUL LEVEY AT THE VATICAN HERE

For others, the pain of making a trip to the Vatican was too great to bear. 

They chose to stay indoors in the quietness of their hotel room, lost in their thoughts, 16,000 kilometres away from home.  

Since touching down in Rome, clergy abuse survivor Peter Blenkiron has shed tears for the men lost as a result of the horror inflicted on them by Catholic priests.

As he stood in front of the Vatican, Mr Blenkiron was overwhelmed by the destruction caused by paedophiles hidden for decades behind their priestly cloaks.  

The catalyst for Mr Blenkiron was when his close friend and football teammate took his own life.

His friend, he said, should be standing side-by-side with him in Rome just as he done on the football field years ago.

Mr Blenkiron broke down when he reflected on the countless suicides and premature deaths that have resulted due to horror inflicted on children by Catholic priests. 

"I walked away from a story back when I was in the darkest of places," Mr Blenkiron said. "Turns out we shared the same untold stories of sexual abuse. He took his own life months later. I vowed to myself the day I read of his premature death that I would be silent no more."

Mr Blenkiron said the men weren't in Rome to seek vengeance or to destroy the Catholic Church. 

"We're here using our collective voices to change the church's organisational structures ... to push for systems to keep all children safe," he said

 "We are here for truth. Healing for those hurting from the damage of yesterday begins when silence is no more."

The trip follows a national crowd-funding campaign to help the survivors bear witness to Cardinal George Pell's evidence in Rome after the  Royal Commission into Institutional Responses to Child Sexual Abuse accepted a medical report which said the he was at risk of heart failure if he made the journey back to Australia.

Clergy sexual abuse victim Paul Levey said the sight of the Vatican made him feel numb.

He felt no godly presence. 

Any faith he had in a higher being was destroyed the first time he was raped by disgraced priest Gerald Ridsdale.

"I feel neutral," he said. "Growing up a Catholic you would think going to the Vatican would be such an exciting experience and you'd be proud to take photos and go home and show them to everybody, but I feel nothing." 

As the rain fell down in St Peter's Square, Mr Levey and clergy abuse survivor Andrew Collins unrolled a banner. On it were the words: Loud Fence Australia comes to Rome, No more silence.

The banner was scattered with signatures of sexual abuse survivors and messages of support from their families and supporters back in Ballarat.

Family and friends of abuse victims started Loud Fence in Ballarat last year during Royal Commission into Sexual Abuse hearings, with bright ribbons tied outside institutions as an overt response to traumas long held silent and a symbol of solidarity with sexual abuse victims.

It has since gone viral with Loud Fences created all over the world including at the gates of the Vatican, London, New York and Bali.

As the men left, they tied two brightly coloured ribbons to the gates outside the Vatican.

The ribbons floated gently in wind. 

In that moment, against the backdrop of a grey,stormy day in Rome, the brightness the ribbons illuminated was more eye-catching than hundreds of years of architecture.