I'm not quite sure who would sign up for the weird social experiment that is Married at First Sight, but I strongly suspect they wouldn't pass strenuous psychological testing.

Take young Lauren for example. She marries a bloke called Andrew after meeting him at the altar and then does a runaway bride, mainly because he is a bit vertically challenged. Was she secretly expecting Andrew Bogut dribbling at the end of the aisle? Or Aaron Sandilands tapping down a wedding ring?

And then there's Deb who is upset because she didn't get the Polynesian guy she requested. But I'm pretty sure it's not a marital pick and mix.

Over on Bride and Prejudice (which made this Jane Austen buff choke on her sauv blanc), mum Sherrie is upset because son Brad has proposed to girlfriend Courtney. There are two main issues she has: a) Brad and Courtney are barely out of nappies and b) this modern day Juliet has already drunk the poison via a botox needle.

And on My Kitchen Rules, everyone seems to be cheering for Tyson, the guy with serious anger management issues, to bring out his inner nasty. It seems to me that "angry, angry man" would make a most unpleasant dinner companion. Mind you, if I was eating lamb brains and pig jowls, I’d probably be moody too.

But if I wanted to sit next to someone who is critiquing my food in a negative manner, his name better start with Man and end in u. And then there’s the so-called romance between burly Kyle and flirty Ash. Is it a cooking show or Tinder with added spice?