A leader in child and family services is calling for radical and widespread changes in the way adults interact with children and approach the management of challenging behaviours.
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Emerging Ballarat stories reveal the violence and humiliation experienced by many at primary schools in the 1950s and 60s and are a reminder of the lasting and profound impacts of the treatment of children.
The latest tale of cruelty and damage follows The Courier's coverage of an incident of public humiliation at St Columba's Primary School in the 1950s that had damaging psychological impacts throughout one man's life.
Child and Family Services (Cafs) chief executive Wendy Sturgess is leading the roll-out of a new model of care at her organisation based on building trust and using an informed approach to behaviour correction.
Staff and carers in Cafs' foster, kinship and residential care and family services programs are being trained in Trust Based Relational Intervention (TBRI).
The model has been used in many countries across the world in the out of home care system, but also in schools and the justice system.
Ms Sturgess said she would love to see the principles applied in a broad range of settings involving children in Ballarat.
She said we, as a society, needed to do better to help every child reach their highest potential and break intergenerational trauma.
"We know for a long time we haven't really understood. We are understanding more as the years go by between brain, body, behaviours and belief systems," Ms Sturgess said.
"Traditional discipline in the old fashioned way doesn't correct behaviour long term because it relies on power and punishment. You might get a quick response of fear but that doesn't work long term.
"Too often kids are being told to sit down, be quiet, go to detention, no one will like you, no one will play with you.
"This is completely the opposite. This approach is about listening to children's needs, giving them options to make better choices, to learn to be calm, to regulate themselves."
Former students who attended primary schools in the 1950s and 60s in Ballarat have shared with The Courier their experiences of violence and humiliation at the hands of teachers which had a lasting psychological impact.
Ballarat North resident Brian Dixon said his experience at St Columba's School in the 1950s affected him throughout the rest of his school years - it took until Year 12 for him to 'come out of his shell'.
Mr Dixon wanted to share his experience after reading the story of fellow former student Martin Mennen in The Courier in April.
Mr Mennen was eight-years-old in Grade 3 at St Columba's School when teaching nuns dressed him up as a girl and paraded him in front of every class, an experience that made life 'impossible for him' from thereon.
He said the nuns wanted to shame him for playing with the girls in his class, calling him a 'sissy', leading to continual bullying following the incident and lifelong feelings of social phobia and psychological distress.
Mr Dixon said he was not surprised to hear Mr Mennen's story, as attending St Columba's in the 1950s and 60s was a 'nightmare' under the leadership of a notoriously cruel principal.
He recalls his own experience of public humiliation at the school, when he was belted in front of all other students in the school yard for playing chasey after she had rung the bell for all students to stop to attention.
This happened a second time when he accidentally ran into another child in the school ground.
"I was always the little kid they could pick on, I was tiny and I was young and came from a non-Catholic family. I think I got a lot of mistreatment from her and others because of that," Mr Dixon said.
"If you weren't behaving she would drag you out by the ears. She came in one day and locked a kid in the cupboard...That's what happened all the time. It was cruel.
"They would make you wash your mouth out with soap but if you had been really bad the nun would come down and do it for you. This was fairly typical of St Columba's in the 50s.
"Catholic education in the 1950s and 1960s was just out of control."
The Courier has heard other horror stories from students of Ballarat primary schools during that time period.
It is understood a culture of violence and humiliation in the school system was a common practice in behaviour control and punishment at the time.
One person said the nuns in charge at one school were 'psychological tormentors' and frequently used emotional and psychological 'brutality' to control students.
"It is important we have these discussions," Mr Dixon said.
"It is all us baby boomers that got caught up in it... It still sits in the back of my mind."
Mr Mennen, who has struggled with the psychological impacts of his humiliating experience his entire life, said it was important to raise awareness of how this treatment of children created lasting negative impacts.
"It is very reassuring to hear other's experiences. If you are a shy or doubting person which I tended to be, it does give you back a little bit of that belief in yourself, that your story is valid," he said.
"Awareness is important for us individuals who were in that situation.
"But I think it is important to also help break the barrier of silence, to help break through that so that people are aware that a lot of people suffered psychologically and for some people it has affected their lives."
While these stories shatter the illusion of the 'good old days' highlighting systemic public humiliation and a culture of violence and abuse, they also show how far the education system has come since.
Mr Mennen said the experiences of him and his fellow students more than 60 years ago could not happen with the awareness existing today.
"In those days the church was so revered and parents didn't feel they could confront the teachers on anything at all, they felt the church was so powerful and we had religion drummed into us. They were beyond reproach," he said.
"Over the years that has changed so dramatically. Now people would feel very differently and the education system, they have made a lot of changes to their practices."
There continue to be calls for improvement for child safety and to learn from the lessons of the past, particularly following the Royal Commission into Institutional Child Sexual Abuse.
It is important we have these discussions. It is all us baby boomers that got caught up in it... It still sits in the back of my mind.
- Brian Dixon, former student at St Columba's School
Monash University Associate Fellow John Whelen wrote in The Conversation in 2017 calling for the introduction of a pledge for teachers to uphold their professional codes of conduct.
He wrote the article after findings from the royal commission were handed down, revealing educational institutions were the second-most-represented in allegations, at 29.8 per cent.
Of all alleged perpetrators, about one in six was a teacher, and by far the majority were male, Associate Fellow Whelen analysed.
He proposed a pledge for educators to be made within schools and upon first employment and a requirement for job applications, like police checks.
"It would indicate a formal declaration to conduct oneself ethically in all educational contexts, regardless of whether or not some individuals ultimately fail to do so," he wrote.
"It seems prudent that in a public and open profession, a public and open pledge to uphold its values should be made."
Ms Sturgess said experiences of trauma, including violence and public humiliation, could change a child's brain development and affect their adult life.
Many children Cafs works with come from traumatic backgrounds. Most have not experienced nurturing, love and a trusted relationship with someone who can help them to regulate, be grounded and feel safe.
"When kids haven't had those nurturing experiences it can significantly alter their brain chemistry," Ms Sturgess said.
"If it is left untreated it can lead to the development of really dysfunctional coping mechanisms to get heard, be seen and get attention. That is clearly a massive challenge.
"It limits the ability for those children to develop functioning relationships. At school there is a barrier and in social situations.
"They don't know how to handle rejection or feedback on their behaviour, they don't learn good coping skills and they don't know how to rely on their own self regulation."
Ms Sturgess said anyone could learn the principles of TBRI to work effectively with children, particularly those who have experienced trauma, and did not have to be a trained psychologist to apply them everyday.
We know we need a revolution in the way we work with children, we need to do something radically different.
- Wendy Sturgess, Cafs CEO
TBRI's three principles are empowerment, through attention to physical needs, connection through attention to attachment needs and correction through attention to behavioural needs.
The principle of correction focuses on correcting the child's behaviour, not criticising the child as a person, and that step comes after building a trusted relationship with the child.
Ms Sturgess said the approach helped children reach their highest potential.
"A child has to feel safe before we can start developing the piece about correction and connection," she said.
"We always talk about their behaviour and not the child, never say you are a bad boy or a bad girl.
"We always seek to empower and build on the strength of what the child was doing that was good, giving them options on what they might have chosen to behave differently.
"There is emerging research to say children who have worked with people who have been trained in this, they learn to regulate their behaviours, they learn to trust people, learn to calm and regulate themselves.
"It is pretty amazing when you see this work on a child that people might have given up on. Sometimes it is because nobody has had the skills, time and investment to work with these kids with complex developmental trauma."
A broad range of Cafs staff, including those who do not work on the frontline with children like members of the finance team, have completed a 10-week training program in TBRI.
Ms Sturgess said many staff said what they learnt was 'profound' and had given them skills and solutions to help their own children.
"Other people have said I belong to a cricket club I can use these skills, they say why haven't teachers been taught this?," she said.
"I don't know why it isn't used more widely but we are starting it at Cafs because we know we need a revolution in the way we work with children, we need to do something radically different.
"We have a deep belief if we can get it up and running, it will take us time, we have to train people and get people confident.
"We have to change our culture in how we work with young people and the respect we show young people and this is a better way.
"I believe there is a lot of capacity for this to be taught in many different settings, with caregivers, teachers, in particular anyone who is working with a child.
"We have got to do better. These are the children of the future. Ideally they learn skills they can take into their own parenting.
"We need to break the cycle of intergenerational trauma. That is one of the things that worries me the most, teaching young people how to navigate relationships in the community successfully."
The Institute of the Sisters of Mercy of Australia and Papua New Guinea responded to Mr Dixon and Mr Mennen's concerns about treatment of children at St Columba's School in a statement to The Courier.
"It is a matter of great sadness and shame for the Sisters of Mercy when a former student has had anything less than positive memories of their experience in one of our schools," a spokesperson said.
"As is our practice, we would welcome an opportunity to talk with anyone who may have concerns so that we can gain a better understanding of the situation.
"Over the decades we have learned so much in our discussions with former students and through the recommendations of the royal commission.
"In response, we have developed and implemented robust practices and policies aimed at protecting children and other vulnerable people in our care.
"Our learning is ongoing, and we are steadfastly committed to responding in a respectful and compassionate way to any former student who approaches us."
Affected by this story? There is help available. You can phone Lifeline on 13 11 14, the Blue Knot Foundation on 1300 657 380, Beyond Blue on 1300 224 636 or Relationships Australia on 1300 364 277.