NURSE and Ballarat mother-of-four Adi Ryan has been trying different techniques for how to best chat with her children about how they were going - a skill she finds baffles many parents.
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With all young adults - her youngest was 16 years old - Ms Ryan said she worried about everything but often found it was hard to check in and get her children talking, especially amid lockdowns.
Ms Ryan has been been working to help shape the Australia-wide #ChatStarter campaign, which launched on Wednesday, offering her perspective as a parent in regional Victoria to help parents and young people start conversations about mental health challenges in a safe way.
"Lockdowns and restrictions still impact everyone and kids especially. Rules are changing all the time and kids are frustrated," Ms Ryan said. "I've always been of the belief it takes a village for raising a child and every child needs an adult to talk to about stuff, but they're not always available.
"A child needs to talk to their parents, but it can be difficult just to get a couple of words out. All parents need to know they don't have to fix it, just listen."
...It can be difficult just to get a couple of words out. All parents need to know they don't have to fix it, just listen.
- Adi Ryan
Ms Ryan said changes in demeanour could be "so sudden". Her youngest daughter is really bright but has lost focus in school and talks of dropping out. She has been finding the jump from year 10 to year 11 schoolwork hard on top of restrictions and the continual stop-start approach to on-site learning.
So, Ms Ryan drives and debriefs.
This has been a way for her children to open-up, without eye contact, while she drives. Ms Ryan figured it was similar, in a way, to parents driving about with their babies to coax them to sleep - she said this offered a comfortable space with discussions staying in the car.
There was also a couch in the house, known as the social couch. While her children might tend to stick to their rooms, she knows when they were on the couch they were interested in having a chat. Ms Ryan said it need not always be deep, but just a chat and chance for her to listen was enough.
Ms Ryan is sharing her experience in #ChatStarter, a collaboration led by National Mental Health Commission, ReachOut, Butterfly Foundation, Orygen, batyr, headspace, Beyond Blue and Kids Helpline.
IN OTHER NEWS
David Coleman, who is assistant minister to Prime Minister Scott Morrison on mental health, launched the campaign in a virtual event on Wednesday morning.
Mr Coleman said everyone had the power to support a person they cared about and different methods worked for different people.
This comes as one in three young Australians experienced high to very high psychological distress in June and 75 per cent of young Australians felt the pandemic had negatively impacted their mental health, according to the united campaign.
Mr Coleman said there was an unprecedented demand on suicide prevention providers and a rise in parents seeking guidance for their children from their general practitioners.
He hope this campaign helped parents find a way to start important conversations, and for young people to better engage with each other for support.
To promote mental health is a passion for Ms Ryan, who experienced her own burn-out last year working with the COVID-19 tracing team and as a nurse on call.
"You have to switch off. Even though we're encouraging people to switch on and connect and talk, it's important to talk in a safe way," Ms Ryan said. "We encourage people to be about about how they're feeling but also know it's okay to seek help.
"You don't need to know all the answers. Young people often just want to be validated and heard."
READ MORE: Grab a biscuit to focus on youth head space
In you or someone you know is in need of crisis support, phone Lifeline, 13 11 14.
Help is also available, but not limited to, headspace Ballarat on 5304 4777; Beyond Blue 1300 224 636 or beyondblue.org.au; and Kids Helpline 1800 55 1800.
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