Ballarat's Kate Gale tells her story of diagnosis, treatment, the battle after illness, and personal evolution

Of course, there have been many accounts on the shock of diagnoses and the nature of the treatment.

There has been much trumpeted about brave souls who have fought the fight. Tributes to those who have perished have also been frequently dedicated.

Yet, tales of the difficulties encountered after recovery have been rare. These ordeals need to be chronicled and Kate Gale is one who is willing to share her story.

The 40 year-old Ballarat resident appears strong and unflappable. However, there have been times when her resolve has been challenged.

One such occasion was at the age of 27 when Ms Gale was diagnosed with a rare form of aggressive breast cancer. At this point, she had been married to husband Bob for four years. The couple had two daughters aged three and one.

Fate seemed to intervene on a notorious day when Ms Gale was plying her early trade as a hairdresser.

"I was speaking to a client just diagnosed with breast cancer," Ms Gale said.

"She got stuck into me saying 'I hope you do self-examinations'. I never had.

"The next morning, I found the lump, the first time I had ever done a breast check."

At that point, Ms Gale's experience with cancer had been limited and, upon diagnosis, she underwent what could be described as an immediate meltdown.

"The hearing of 'You've got cancer' led straight into 'I'm going to die'," Ms Gale said.

"Thank God, I had my husband there with me. It was straight into the negative. I got really angry."

IN OTHER NEWS:

Fortunately, the period of trauma was short-lived.

"It took me two hours of crying for me to go, 'I've got way too much time yet and I've got two little girls I've got to fight for," Ms Gale said.

"I was pretty driven."

The treatment to address the cancer was unrelenting. Six months of chemotherapy was one course of action.

"It wasn't easy," Ms Gale remembered.

"The first four chemos, I was bedridden for a week."

Radiation occurred each day for six weeks.

"I was so burnt," she said.

"My chest looked like a charred body in the movies. You get so fatigued."

The 18 months of treatment included four surgeries within a month. There had been an unsuccessful lumpectomy and a mastectomy of the right breast. Herceptin had come onto the Pharmaceutical Benefits Scheme, bringing with it life-saving benefits. During treatment, Ms Gale's state of mind fluctuated.

"It changed constantly," she said.

"I was in survival mode. I did what I had to do to get through."

Getting through it Ms Gale did, but little did she know her resolve would again be challenged.

"Once the oncologist said, 'Off you go and live your life', that was probably just as hard as hearing, 'You've got cancer'," Ms Gale revealed.

"It's wonderful you don't have to put yourself through that anymore, but at the same time, it's all you've known for 18 months. Mentally, that was the hardest part. I had lost the old Kate."

A crisis of identity unfolded.

"I didn't know who I was," Ms Gale said.

"I was defined as that 'breast cancer girl'. Once your safety net gets taken, it's like, 'What do I do now?'"

Ms Gale was faced with the physical changes from the ordeal.

"(Physical change) was a massive thing," Ms Gale said.

"I always had my hair done nicely (and) my make-up was on point. I had a good set of boobs. All of a sudden, I've got one."

The internal battle was ongoing with Ms Gale hiding her feelings from most.

"I wasn't me," Ms Gale said. "I was really struggling. I found anxiety. Bob and the girls, they'd see the anxiety, but I didn't let anybody outside see.

"I've got great family and friends; I needed them to be strong for me. They saw the strong Kate. I felt, if I put a crack in that brick wall I surrounded myself with, they'd crumble. I needed them to hold me up so they never saw the anxiety."

Following the loss of identity, metaphoric roads were travelled and soul searching was done. On a pivotal occasion, Ms Gale's husband was exceedingly blunt which, in hindsight, was the necessary tact.

"We were having a barney and he said, 'It's over, Kate. You need to get over it'," Ms Gale recounted.

"That took my breath away. I went, 'No, it's not'. My treatment was over, but I had to live the rest of my life with that hanging over my head. I think that was the point when I just went, 'What do you want to do with your life? Life's too short."

Ms Gale's evolution was to continue.

"A cancer journey is never over," Ms Gale said. "You've got to find a way to deal with it. I had cancer, but it never had me."

Another step in the quest for a new self involved further surgery.

"I know it wasn't my fault, but financially, emotionally, I'd put everyone through so much, to turn around and have breast reconstruction, which was going to cost $10,000, I didn't think I was worthy of that," Ms Gale said.

"So, I put it off, pretended I was happy with my fake breast. Every time I went shopping, it was crap; you've got to find something that was higher in the neckline. Sexually, I didn't feel I was worthy.

"Eight years down the track, I went to Bob and I said, 'I would like to have reconstruction'. He said, 'We'll find the money'. My life completely changed. I was whole again."

Perspective was altered and talking was embraced, but neither was easy.

"There is no normal," Ms Gale said. "(When ill) I wanted things to go back to normal, but nothing is normal once you have a cancer diagnosis. You're a changed person."

While anxiety remains, Ms Gail possesses a 'toolkit' of strategies to help her from the morass. Writing is important as is sharing with others.

"Talking is a big thing for me," she said. "If you get offered counselling, take it. There's no shame in opening up."

If you are seeing this message you are a loyal digital subscriber to The Courier, as we made this story available only to subscribers. Thank you very much for your support and allowing us to continue telling Ballarat's story. We appreciate your support of journalism in our great city.