I woke that Monday morning to the news another woman had been the fatal victim of brutal violence in the Ballarat community.
Subscribe now for unlimited access.
$0/
(min cost $0)
or signup to continue reading
It is in this community that I lead WRISC, a specialist family violence service.
This was now three women - Samantha Murphy, Rebecca Young and Hannah McGuire - who have been killed in as many months.
This was unprecedented. It was shocking.
Within seconds of the radio alarm going off, I gathered myself and leapt out of bed, trying to work out what I needed to attend to with the highest priority. As the numbing reality set in, I tried to imagine the week that was to come.
Realising the unprecedented culmination of these events the texts, the phone calls, the planning, the responses, the words of compassion started buzzing around.
As I drove to work that morning, I tried to imagine the horror of the families, obliterated because of this violence for years and lifetimes to come. I felt sick.
I found myself wondering too how this would affect the whole Ballarat region and its community. Would this final occurrence be the tipping point? Would there be enough public outcry to finally make a difference in the community? Would we all be able to work together to try to stop this scourge? Would we be able to ask the hard questions about why this happens?
As the whole staff gathered over Teams that morning we shared the news, acknowledged the horror, talked together, and tried to formulate a plan for our service delivery, our response to the community, our grief for something unprecedented.
My thoughts wandered into the work WRISC staff do every day to support victims of family violence.
For 36 years, WRISC has been doing this difficult work, tentatively hoping that violence against women will reduce. That it will change.
As the organisation grew, as the recommendations of the Royal Commission into Family Violence became a reality, as more people began to understand what causes family violence, surely then things will change, we thought.
Surely the men in our community who choose to use violence - and indeed all in our community - will acknowledge that violence against women is never an option.
That violence against women is never justified.
As the course of the day and the week wore on, I watched as the WRISC staff resolutely kept going on with their work - like they always do, with strength, courage, and wisdom. I watched as every day they strove to empower the women and children they work with, centering their client's safety and addressing their level of risk from factors such as disrespect, coercion, social isolation, physical violence, fear, humiliation, homelessness, and threats from the men who choose to use violence in their lives.
Despite many in the community finding ways to justify the actions of perpetrators or where social media comments escalated hatred towards women, the collective gift of all those who have been part of the WRISC community over the past 36 years gathered momentum and invisibly wrapped us all with strength to continue.
During that week, I watched the family violence workers and leaders come together in a song of lament, to plan media messages, to tell stories of the family violence situation in Ballarat and surrounds, to build an action plan, to advocate, to plan a rally and to find the collective words that encourage the whole community that there are ways to stop this inhumanity.
As you read this, you all have the potential to be part of the collective solution. We all have that potential.
If you are a man, your individual and collective voice is imperative to influence other men to address their anger, their violence and disrespect towards women, their jokes and public humiliation of women. Bear witness to the actions of men in your lives that do not reflect respect.
If you are a parent, take responsibility to teach your children, especially your sons to respect everyone, particularly women, and to realise that violence is never an option.
If you are part of the legal and police system, hold those who break intervention orders accountable.
If you are part of other professions and sectors - build a workplace of respect and equity.
If you are a part of a sporting club or church or other social group, encourage and work for a healthy culture of equality and respect.
As the week unfolded, I reflected on the effect of this inhumanity on children, who are so often the neglected voices.
How do we as a community explain the actions of those who choose to use violence?
How do we enfold our children so that their lives are encircled by love, and not invaded with fear and worry because of the actions of those that they have the right to trust and love?
The weeks will continue to unfold for the Ballarat community.
Perhaps the untimely, violent deaths of Samantha Murphy, Rebecca Young, Hannah McGuire - and all the other women who have lost their lives or suffered due to violence - are not in vain.
Within our sphere of influence, we can hold each other accountable to foster healthy, respectful relationships, work for equality of opportunity, reduce anger and hatred and make the Ballarat region a safer, healthier and more respectful community where we can all live and thrive together.
Elizabeth Jewson is the chief executive officer of WRISC Family Violence Support in Ballarat.
